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标题: [娱乐] [转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事 [打印本页]

作者: LuckyXiaowen    时间: 2006-11-14 11:31     标题: [转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事

<span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;"><font face="宋体">倒霉蛋的</font></span><b><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">31</span></font></b><b><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">件衰事</span></font></b><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;"><br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  我很衰,不只是我自己倒霉,就连谁对我好或者我对谁好,谁都会倒霉。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
7 l9 ~$ N7 J8 |. |7 f* F' m: C3 \/ l; j                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">1.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">出生的时候,刚好赶上了接生护士失恋,我由于没在第一时间哭出声来,结果被她一顿暴打。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">: Y0 Z1 t/ w5 T4 Q- q
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">2.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">一岁的时候,刚学会爬着走路,满屋子爬,结果在我的床下摸到了一个老鼠夹。据说那个老鼠夹买回来两年了,一只老鼠没夹着,第一次夹到的就是我的手。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">; }9 B4 |' E! C5 h, j& H7 q0 Z
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">3.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">两岁的时候,我学会了走路。在家里和爸妈捉迷藏。我躲在我的床下,结果踩到了另一个老鼠夹。据说这个老鼠夹买回来三年了,第一次夹到的就是我的腿。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
" D2 {! }% N$ K, k% T: Q                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">4.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">三岁的时候,我想下楼梯。隔壁的张老太说要牵我下楼梯</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">免得摔着。结果话没说完,她就直接摔下楼梯了。从四楼顺着楼梯摔到了一楼,直接跨入老年痴呆阶段。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
1 {: p  y8 P- F                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">5.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">四岁的时候,警察叔叔牵我过马路,我还没说谢谢。他就被辆摩托车撞到了马路对面,一级残疾。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">- b( F- O7 Z* s
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">6.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">五岁的时候,爸爸送我去幼儿园。幼儿园阿姨夸我长得很漂亮</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">话刚说完,五楼就掉了个花瓶下来,直接命中了阿姨的头盖骨。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
6 w3 \6 v) \! N/ I2 F/ G                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">7.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">六岁的时候,第一次上动物园。我说,那头公熊猫比那头母熊猫好看。第二天,那头被我夸我的熊猫死于难产。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
& }6 ^: G$ O# ?' [1 e                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">8.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">七岁的时候,我上了小学。期末考试,数学老师说我考了</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">59</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">分</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">就算</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">60</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">分好了。第二天,数学老师死于车祸。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
( v, o8 `, q: b$ k" q# W                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">9.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">八岁的时候,我夸我们班那位女生长得好漂亮。五分钟后,这位女生赶上了罕见的流星雨。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">2 ^# l& X9 o7 g2 x9 {6 m
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">10.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">九岁的时候</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">我学会了抢劫。我拦路抢劫了一个五岁的小朋友。结果被他一顿暴打。他自称是少林寺俗家弟子。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">  C) @. ?$ |; g. z  ^& b3 s; @
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">11.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十岁的时候,我和小胖一块上厕所。小胖夸我上厕所的样子真帅</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">我正准备说谢谢,小胖已经掉进了厕所。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
1 I- `) P3 f! I                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">12.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十一岁的时候,老师问我三七等于多少。我说三七二十一。老师说,你真聪明,话没说完死于心脏病。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">0 e# p% }7 n$ U- L" j1 r* t
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">13.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十二岁的时候,小学毕业考试。监考老师对我说,快抓紧时间</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">时间不多了。我说,谢谢老师的提醒。刚说完,老师头顶的电风扇掉落了</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">...... <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">14.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十三岁的时候</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">我读初中了。我之前的经历吓得没人敢和我接近。只有一个号称大胆的王姓同学跟我说了一句:我不相信你会这么背,当天下午,王大胆被两头公牛追了八条街。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">" O& m! E1 P/ J
                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">15.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十四岁的时候,老师要我们写作文,题目叫</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">&lt;</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">我们的大桥</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">&gt; </span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">。我在作文里提到:城里的那座大桥很雄伟</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">.......</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">第二天,我去上课的时候,发现那座大桥突然倒塌了。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">
( L9 d- L7 a; j( C# g% m                        <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">16.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十五岁的时候,我喜欢上了一个女孩。我不敢说出来,怕害了她。可我控制不了自己,终于我挑了个晴朗天气在学校空旷的操场上跟她表白。</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">据天气预报说,当天绝对不会有流星雨。可当我表白后,地震发生了,我看着这位女孩哭着掉进了裂层中</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">...... <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">17.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十六岁的时候</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">我读高中了。我喜欢上了踢足球</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">,</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">对方守门员夸我球踢得不错。于是,球门突然倒塌了</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">...... <br/><br/></span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">  </span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">18.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">十七岁的时候,我跟着人群去观摩跳楼实景。结果,我被他压在了身下</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">......</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">两个月后,我和他双双出院</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">.</span></font><font color="#000000" size="1"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black;">在住院部门口,他对我说谢谢我救了他。于是,他被另一个跳楼的压在了身下,这次他没能幸免于难</span></font><font face="ˎ̥" color="#000000" size="1"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 9pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: ˎ̥;">...... <br/></span></font>
作者: yy9k    时间: 2008-4-3 14:25     标题: 回复:[转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事

老文还有13件呢?你不会也不说吧?
作者: renew    时间: 2008-4-3 14:41     标题: 回复:[转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事

哈哈哈哈哈哈~~~
1 Q" E6 I* s! S; B3 |) L! d
) q( t/ K1 @* L9 _4 a我认为这句最搞笑~~:emot26: " J/ S% {( d' R: \7 ^  r
; k2 j1 k( `. d# I, w7 }+ \& [
  10.九岁的时候,我学会了抢劫。我拦路抢劫了一个五岁的小朋友。结果被他一顿暴打。他自称是少林寺俗家弟子。
作者: LuckyXiaowen    时间: 2008-4-3 15:01     标题: 回复:[转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事

我也很奇怪怎么少了13件。可能是因为13不吉利,所以就留了18条,意为“要发”~~
作者: renew    时间: 2008-4-3 15:12     标题: 回复: [转帖]倒霉蛋的31件衰事

[quote] 原帖由 LuckyXiaowen 于 2008-4-3 15:01:00 发表
' B# s6 ]6 ~3 b我也很奇怪怎么少了13件。可能是因为13不吉利,所以就留了18条,意为“要发”~~ [/quote
( Q1 S! \, Z2 S" k9 j! |( }$ k& A$ l( i4 b6 k

8 k% b4 \  R7 E! `! o真看不出来你想像力也能有这么丰富的时侯呀。。。。。。:emot110::emot110:




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